X-MAS RAPTURE GETS RUPTURED

By Ed Gauthier
Editor

T'was four nights before Christmas
And throughout the vast web
The doomsday nonsense
Did finally ebb

The christians ripped off the dead sea scrolls to patch together their fake bible collection of anecdotes, just as they joined in on this most recent "12/21/12 end of the world' scam.

I went around today to all my kooky christian pals and told 'em, "The rapture happened, but you just didn't make the cut. So we're all stuck down here Left Behind with Kirk Cameron!"

A lot of these holier than thou types almost cried.

Odd as it is to say, it really made my Christmas this year.

And BTW, the "second coming" already happened - it was a little thing called "Easter" - remember?

Have a good one, folks, and enjoy the sleep of the relieved. (Whew!)

And now that there's nothing stopping, keep on shopping!