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Sunday, March 17, 2013

EASTERN 'AFTERLIFE': TOO TIRING


Clock-in time... yet again.
This is also the first time anyone's "job"
required them to cheat on their wife!


By Ed Gauthier
Editor

Okay, fine - to see how patently absurd it is, let's take that particular kooky Eastern afterlife scenario claim by the Muslims to its logical conclusion:

Sure, most dead (and assumedly straight) guys might enjoy a wild weekend with some less experienced, jaded chicks, and lots of free booze. But after that, THEN what?

The same babes and booze again for the next few weeks- and the following months, years, decades and centuries, etc.? Yep. Because the afterlife is one heckuva long time!

And remember, they're only granted a limited number of chicks - meaning the same chicks. And they're only granted a certain type of booze - meaning wine, in this case.

Alright, newbies and wine, newbies and wine, over and over, with no variety - ever. Yes, after awhile, that same "wild weekend" would get awfully close to boring.

You would always have to play the teacher in the romantic department, and guzzle most of the alcohol. This would therefore impair your senses, otherwise it wouldn't be alcohol.

So you'd basically be a drunk teacher forever, like it or not.

Sounds like a very exhausting job in itself, when the whole point of any "heaven" is supposed to be retirement and relaxation!

__________________________________________
(Oh, and... Happy St. Patrick's Day.)


Monday, March 4, 2013

YT POST DUMP: FEB 2013

SELECTED YOUTUBE COMMENTS


The famous Blog Bus in action:
One man's trash might be another man's treasure...
but what the heck do men know? Am I right, girls? Yep!


By Ed Gauthier

What's below is a buncha YouTube stuff I've babbled about on the internets in the last couple weeks or so, followed by the titles of whose original post uploads I was babbling to.

Sure, some of it's out of context, since you often don't know what specific comment I was replying to at the time, but just think of it as a fun guessing game, kids!

It's pretty long, but there's lotsa cool stuff crammed in there. Hey, I keep getting emails that say you wanted me to post more here, so this should keep you satisfied for quite awhile. Enjoy!


* * * * * *

THE SIMPSONS "ORIGINALITY"

No, I actually don't remember Matt doing that big originality thing. He's always gone with the "let the creative ones lead" attitude, then he would cobble together his copy - errr... satire - of it. (The Simpsons' cousin Married With children was a pretty inventive show, though.) 

("Homer Shake" | THE SIMPSONS | Animation on FOX by ANIMATIONonFOX) 



THE MOB AND THE MOGULS

The press-titutes in the early 1970s pretended to be shocked that for the first time the "mob shook hands with the film biz"? Gotta laugh at that, since all movie studios used union chapters for their crews, and the mob had already been running the unions since the 1930s. So it took them 40 years to finally catch on to that? Brilliant reporting, guys - whatta hot new scoop!

(The Godfather And TheMob by Carey Hogan)

FINANCIAL FLUBS

Of course the solution to the debt problem is more debt. Just as the NRA's solution to the gun problem is more guns. And the solution to the idiocy problem in Washington is to elect more idiots. Thankfully I didn't put a downpayment on a house, nor earned enough dough to pay taxes for political crooks to gamble with on the stock market. So being mediocre is a blessing. Let them hop around and threaten the system all they want. They'll never get an extra dime off me - because I refuse to earn it!

(Raw footage of Jim Rogers interview - The Bubble film by TheBubbleFilm)

GIRLS GONE GAMBLING

Joey Franky must be the lousiest gambler ever, so why did he gamble? Plus the world knows who Steve Wynn is, and we know he doesn't think or talk like a two-bit 1950s gangster, so why would Joey think we'd buy that baloney for a minute? Oh, ya - because of that first thing, where he's the lousiest gambler ever. BTW, Joey has also been in and out of jail for a host of other non-Wynn scenario reasons, as well.

(Girls Gone...Bankrupt! by TheYoungTurks)

DO THE HARLEM SHAKE: WHY?

The Harlem Shirk? No, thanks. Back in the day they had true family values, with... the Mocka-reena! 

(Harlem Shake on a Plane [Video] by TheYoungTurks)

CASH FOR CLINKY COINS? NOPE

100% correct. The goldbugs have always had a screw loose: they say cash is collapsing one moment, then brag the next moment how in a few years they're going to "cash" in their goofy yellow coins. (With no cash existing?) Sorry, but the US is now and will always be the king printer of record for paper money currency, recognized wordwide. This isn't the 1600s anymore, and we're not pirates playing with dubloons. That's a kids' game. And PM stuff is a mug's game.

(Eric Sprott: Price of Gold and Silver are Being Suppressed & No Gold in the Treasury by Greg Hunter)

PREP THIS

Even if that "falling rock with little rocks trailing behind it" story was a hoax, it was the most badly-timed one you could imagine. Most people just assume it was that stuff that just hit Russia. But as to the anti-gun UN resolution, fight's over and the gun-nuts lost. Sorry, but choosing to "not honor" something legal you don't happen to agree with, really doesn't cut it. Them guns are history. Obama already said he'd be signing it this month. So it's all over but the shooting... literally.
(Dr Deagle Show 2013/03/01 - PREPAREDNESS, EARTH CHANGES, SPACE WEATHER & MARTIAL LAW by urupiper2)

BIG WIND IN FROM THE AIRWAVES

Attention George Knapp: Always enjoy the show, but that term from your intro is sirocco, the wind named after a country and a desert, or vice versa - either way, there is no H in the word, so it is pronounced SUR-ock-oh, and not SHUR--ock-oh. Please correct. Thank you.

(Jan 27 2013 - UFOs Secrets & Leaks by C2CVAULT)

OSCAR BY GOSHCAR

J-Law only got this because they weren't allowed to give her an Oscar for Hungry Games. Likewise, A-Hath only got hers because they weren't allowed to give her an Oscar for Catwoman Games. Next, I'll probably see them both together in the same movie (Bridal Games), and I'll fall asleep halfway through.

(Jennifer Lawrence wins best actress Oscar by oscargoesto2013)

ADELE IS A DOLL

I'm new to the whole Adele phenomenon. She seems to be very talented, unpretentious and honest. Therefore she hasn't got a prayer of ever making it big in Hollywood. 

(Adele wins Oscar for Skyfall theme by oscargoesto2013)

RUSH LIMBURGER? BETTER NO RUSH AT ALL

Being unable to prove that Clinton ever had full-on sexual intercourse with a white house intern was the day that liberals first beat your brains in, Rush. Every Obama-blessed day since then has only been icing on the cake.

(Limbaugh Wails: Left Has Beaten Us! by TheYoungTurks)

SHOWBOATS SHOULD DROP ALL (TV NEWS) ANCHORS

These bums are all only so-called journalists - so-called by themselves, that is. They're not schooled and professional newspapermen, they're TV turd actors, and nothing more. As to any "worst order" of who's currently the loudest Republiscum rooter, it would probably be: 1) Rush Limburger. 2) Glenn Barf. 3) Bill O'Riot. 4) Shawn Klanity. 5) Ann Clunker.

(Is Hannity The Worst Journalist Ever? by TheYoungTurks)

ROBERT WOODWARD GOES DOWNWARD

In the early 1970s, Bobby Woody wrote a decent book with his pal Carl Bernstein. He was right to do so, but has rarely been right since. So after that book got published, Bob should have started shutting his pompous pie hole. 

(White House 'Threat' vs. Bob Woodward by TheYoungTurks)

ELIMINATING THE COM-POT-ITION

Of course Clinton and the Bush family are "anti pot' - THEY'RE the ones selling pot and most other drugs via the military, so they want to eliminate their competition. Just like they're also anti-Mexican cartel - since it's yet another form of competition. Meanwhile, Prager and Carolla? Don't know what you're thinkin', Adam - you might as well bump up with Jerry Springer. So what? 

(Dennis Prager, Adam Carolla interview by Jeremy Green)

EXPOSURE CAUSES RASH OF RAPID "RETIREMENTS"

Sure the Pope is trying to avoid jail by suddenly "retiring." I look forward to the Queen attempting to pull the same stunt.

(MrEdWeirdoShow replied to a comment from guavaball)

AND YA CAIN'T HAVE NO MINI-NUKES, NEITHER, VIRGIL

Speaking of basic reading, there's nothing in 2A claiming that all citizens must always be equal in firepower to government soldiers. Which is why non-gov people don't have nukes. All they had back then were basic rifles, and that's all anyone envisioned for the future. Nukes and auto-weapons were unheard of and therefore undreamt of. BTW, there are ZERO well-regulated militias in official existence today. The last of them floundered and faded in the 1800s, later folding into the National Guard.

(Bob Woodward Irate That President Obama is Not Ignoring Constitution by SamSeder)

SOME CREATURES AREN'T IN IT FOR THE CASH

From Ruth Montgomery's "They Walk Among Us" books, to John Mack, Bud Hopkins and David Jacobs, the abduction story since at least the early 1970s has been leading up to the generational "blend in" point. 15 years means the first ones blended in 1985, so 30 means the rest getting here since 2000. They've been here en mass for about a dozen years - how do they like it so far? You'd think they'd certainly want to help out our economy, at least, right? After all, they have to live here, too!
(Half-Blood ET/humans Among Us by Jasper Seren)

GOOD BOSSES DON'T RILE THE RANK AND FILE

This dome called Earth is a mere prison planet, where for eons, tons of different races have been dumped here. Therefore aliens would no more want to "invade" one of their prison planets any more than in 1950 we'd want to go "invade" Alcatraz. They already "rule" us via the politiicians they control, so anything more is a wasted exercise. In fact it would be to their disadvantage to mess with those who already accomplish their bidding, working for peanuts and digging up their drugs=cash=gold.
(When aliens attack [full video] by emperoroftruth)

WHAT ARE WE SEEKING, AND WHAT IS THE QUEST?

Sequester? Most Americans no doubt think that's just another video game. And frankly, maybe it's better that way.

(Rush Limbaugh Hopes Americans Won't Realize Cost of Sequester by SamSeder)

A CASHLESS COUNTRY MEANS EVERYTHING WOULD BE FREE

Everywhere you look in every country throughout the world, it's the Keystone Kops on the take. The root of all crime-related problems is that so many people revolve their lives around the almighty dollar. But that should at least give us great hope that therefore the dollar will never collapse. All those crooks don't fight and die for it daily because it'll be gone tomorrow. No, the dollar ain't goin' nowhere, baby. 

(The Russian Mafia: A World History by mmiBooks)

PRESIDENT WAS WHO IN 2016?

No "time traveller" can ever be taken seriously unless they can name the new president elect for 2016 or 2020, etc. So far the list of people doing so is... ZERO. Including good old "Mr. 2037": Who got elected president in 2036, then? No clue? Nobody comes to mind? Even though you supposedly lived THERE in 2037, under a president? Ergo, pure fakery!
(John Titor - Art Bell Coast to Coast AM 4/5/2000 Time Travel by Michael Mitreski)

CATWOMAN DOES BATMAN'S HEAVY-LIFTING FOR HIM

Johnny Flicky keeps dancing around the fact that Nolan's Batman 3 was a bomb! And I don't just mean the theater shooting during its premiere week, which was in itself hardly a good omen!. No, I mean that Bats just sits there like an impotent sap, while his galpal Catwoman clobbers Bane! That sucked, and made the whole movie suck! Plus, who sends almost an entire NY police force into a sewer search?! Well, maybe former mayor Ed Koch, but then he's DEAD, now, isn't he?! Argggh! (RANT COMPLETED)
(WHY BATMAN IS BAD FOR GOTHAM CITY by JohnFlickster)

WHAT'S IN A NAME? YOUR BRAIN

Most people live up to their names, so Hitler liked to hit lots of people. Before Hitler was born, his dad should have just changed the family name to Niceler. Problem solved.

(The Hitler Family by DandDBroadCasting39)

BACTERIA BRUNCH? NO, THANKS!

Crowded hospitals loaded with germs means their cafe would likeiwse be loaded with germs. So instead just go to a pizza joint down the road. No biggie. Your tummy will thank you in the morning.

(A Romantic Hospital Date! by thetruthergirls)

THOSE RUSSKIES CAN'T EVEN STOP A STUPID OLD ROCK

It's mighty contradictory how since the 1960s both the US and Russia were always bragging about having all these super-advanced particle beam-type guns, ready to shoot down an enemy nuke missle - or any kind of missle - at a moment's notice. Yet here comes this big fat thing, just waltzing into Russia, getting nothing whatsoever shot at it, proceeding to hit their country, killing over a thousand people. What if it had been a nuke from some crazy foreigners like North Korea or whatever? Huh?!

(Fake Asteroid Impact Coming Soon! by gmoore49)

GOT A TV SHOW HOPE? MAKE IT ABOUT DOPE

Not interested in the least in Breaking, Weeds or any other DRUG-related drek. The fact that for years they were giving out Emmy noms like candy to that Malcolm star and his pals is proof that America's addiction to dope (including prescriptions) is at a crazy level, keeping the Mexi-tels in solid biz down there. BTW, Kevin's hats are often a fail, when the hat bands are too wide, like on this episode. It's supposed to be just a strip around the bottom, not like a huge headband Loverboy video!

(KPCS: Bob Odenkirk #154 by kevinpollakschatshow)

BAN UNCLE SAM FROM GAMBLING WITH OUR CLAMS!

Social Security tax raises are like herpes, Sam? Not at all. In fact, it's the opposite - the more we can get poured into that fund, the less the fatcats can claim, "Hey, Social Security's going down the tank, so we have to go gamble with the fund money to 'bolster' it." Sorry, but I want only WE the people - and not the banksters - to bolster our own SS fund. Their version of fixing things only means we'll never see our money again, so no thanks!

(How Debt Obsessionists Tip Toe Around Austerity by SamSeder)

ANOTHER DAY (LEWIS), ANOTHER OSCAR GIFT

Day-Lewis didn't deserve it for Left Foot, but deserved one for Gangs Of New York. Deserved the Lincoln one, but not the other one (Let There Be Blood), where they were just shutting out Rourke for The Wrestler. It's often about politics and rebounds. Lawrence won for Playbook, but deserved it for Hunger Games. As to Waltz - ya, we get it, you can play a prick - so? Probably an extension of his own personality, so who cares? Let's see him play a NICE guy all the way through, if he thinks he's such a great ding-dang actor!

(Oscars 2013 Winners & Losers by wetmovie1)

THE MAIN PAIN ABOUT THE DOMAIN GAME

Being a veteran fansite domainer, I'd say it's fairly common for greedy celebrities and ("estate-reprsesenting" company lawyers) to try to steal domains from years-long owners, claiming that said owner is a mere "cyber-squater." The celeb (or company feeling related to a particuler name) was too lazy or stupid to have registered that domain name before anyone else. But now they've woken up, and are eager to use the "you just want to charge me money, so you're a scammer" ploy. But it's the celeb who offered to BUY it!
(HYPOCRISY LEVEL: RON PAUL by TheAmazingAtheist)